4 Tiny Shifts I Make Every Winter (so I feel cozy, not crushed)

Sam Vander Wielen: When it gets dark, before you even finish work for the day, it can feel like your whole life shrinks with the daylight. On the one hand, you’re like, maybe I’ll just hibernate until April and come out when it’s warmer. But this year you want winter to feel different. You want it to feel cozy instead of crushing, and you want it to support your mood and leave this season feeling restored, not run down.

But here’s the deal, whether you’ve navigated seasonal depression or just the winter blues, you know, it just won’t magically fix itself. We’ve got to put in the work to shift our attitude and build ourself a few systems and habits that support us through these chilly months. And my gosh, has it been chilly?

So in today’s episode, I’m walking you through exactly how I manage myself in the winter, my routines, my mindset shifts, and little fun things that I build in on purpose, so I have something to look forward to. If you’ve been dreading these colder months, or you’re just sick of it already, and you’re ready for the beach, think of this as your winter game plan. How to use the season to rest and restore without losing yourself in the process.

If you’re new here, welcome to On Your Terms®. This is a podcast for online business owners that want to be as present in their lives as profitable in their businesses. And if we spend the whole winter just moaning and complaining about how upset we are, that it’s winter, we’re not gonna be very successful in our businesses, let alone very present in our lives.

Now if you wanna spend a cozy hour with me next week, hopefully you know that I have my first free live legal training of the entire year next Monday, February 9th. I only host this live legal training twice a year, and the next one won’t be until the end of 2026. So you’re definitely going to want to come to this.

I’ll leave the link down in the show notes for you to sign up. It’s completely free, and if you wanna use 2026 as your year to get your online business up and running, you cannot afford to miss this class. It’s where I’ll walk you through the five steps you need to take in order to get your business started legally.

Now before we move into today’s episode, it’s time for everybody’s favorite segment where I pull a random life question card and answer the question, but also invite you to do the same. And whether you journal, just give it some time, give it some thought, or you wanna reach out to me and let me know what your answer was. But you’s the question of the week.

If you stripped away everything you do to prove you’re enough, the achievements, the hustle, the productivity, what would actually be left that feels like you, and what would you want more of in that version of your life? If I stripped away the achievements, the hustles and the, the hustle and the productivity.

Well, I’m afraid kids that there wouldn’t be much left. No, there, there would be something. Let’s see. So if I stripped away everything I do to prove I’m enough, what would actually be left? That feels like me. Actually, I think that at my core I’m like a very chill person. You know, I, I have this like Philly exterior where I’m all like, tough, whatever, but I, I, it’s really, I don’t feel like that’s like truly who I am.

I feel like that’s more of like a learned environment behavior. And so I feel like if you stripped away anything I felt like I needed to do for myself or others to feel like I was enough, I just would be probably a pretty chill beach bum that probably would never have been on social media and would like.

Be like some surfer girl living in Maui or something like that. I don’t know. That’s probably like, that’s the first thing that comes to mind. So I’m so curious what came up for you and like what, yeah, what your response is to this question.

So like this whole winter blues idea is sort of new to me or is like sort of something new that I’ve had to navigate in the last several years when I moved from my hometown of Philadelphia to Long Island where I live now. And so we live on the north shore of Long Island pretty far out east, and it’s cold, wet, like windy, dark, cold.

Did I mention cold? It’s just, it’s a lot different than where I grew up. Um, it’s often. Uh, five to 10 degrees colder than like when I check my hometown weather on any given day, even though geographically it is so close. But, you know, island weather, island living and that really, like moving to Long Island really pushed me to have to learn to be in the cold.

And I didn’t expect it at first. Like when I first moved there, I was a little surprised and it kind of caught me off guard. So, at first, I would say the first winter was sort of sad for me ’cause I was like, wait a minute. Like I, I always go for walks after work and what am I supposed to do for this like period of months.

It’s dark by 3:45, it’s starting to get dark by like 4, 4:15. It is dark. So I had to figure something out quickly. I love living there, and so I knew that if I’m going to keep living on Long Island, which I plan to, then these winters are going to be a thing. So I kind of have to figure out how to navigate them in a healthier way.

So I feel like over the years I have developed a little bit of a toolkit, both in actual like tools and gear and then on the other hand, more like mindset and attitude related that have not just helped me to like deal with the winter season, but have actually helped me to look forward to it and even thrive in it some might say.

I think the first thing you have to address if you want to change your relationship with winter is your attitude and your mindset towards it. It really helps to start paying attention to how even you just talk about winter, like do you always find yourself telling people like, oh, I hate winter. I hate the cold, I hate this, I hate that. Or like, I hate how dark it gets so early. Right?

Even if we might feel that way, I think it’s really helpful to pay attention to the way we talk about things, at least for myself, I will tend to talk about something like that repeatedly and it sort of builds it up in my mind and it almost cements it as being true, right?

Like it’s like I’m manifesting it and making it be true, but I’m also giving it a lot of power and attention. So one of the best things, the first thing that I did when it came to winter was like, I’m just not going to start, like thinking about winter is like winter is bad, summer is automatically good because it’s warm. Clearly there have to be things about winter or cold seasons that are also positive things. So let me stop treating it like it’s one is good and one is bad.

I think even just being open to that and starting to pay attention to my language then led me to some more openness and curiosity about like, okay, what is fun about winter?

Like, oh, there are all of these things that you get to do here in winter. Or, I love holiday decorations, for example. I love seeing everybody’s lights. I love when you drive by people’s houses and you see all their Christmas trees in the window, like, there are all these little things. There’s all these little like traditions.

Like one of my neighbors hosts a open house caroling event, one of my other neighbors, and I co-host a neighborhood holiday gathering. That’s something I look forward to every single year. Like there are specific things about this time period and the season that I really appreciate.

You know what else I learned, like living on Long Island for like the last four years is that there’s also a cyclical like appreciation I’ve started to have. So like when you live on Long Island, for example, you, I mean, you’re just surrounded by water. You’re on an island, so it’s all beaches everywhere and it’s very much a beach culture. Boating culture. Like to me, living on Long Island feels like a vacation. And my neighborhood feels like a vacation all the time.

And like everybody drives golf carts and like, it just feels very vacationy, right? And on the one hand it would be really easy, and it was easy for me when I first moved there to be like, this is a summer place. Therefore when it gets cold and dark here, it sucks, right? But instead I, after going through this enough times, I realized that the summers are incredible.

They’re amazing. I go to the beach all the time. I do all these things. Amazing. I am also exhausted by the end of the summer because by the end of the summer we have had so many parties and gatherings and boat trips and beach days, and we meet our friends at the beach and we, we get Olipop and we make, uh, like a fun dessert and like, these are all incredible fun things, right?

I work out more, I think go to the gym more. I work workout outside more. I do all these things more. It’s amazing. And I leave the summer feeling tired. So over time I started seeing it as like the winter is like my antidote to the busy summer. It’s my time to rest and relax. But it’s also what lets me actually be ready for and excited about when summer comes back. And without having winter, like, without having this time period that kind of brings everybody out of, uh, summer mode, right? And like, and forces everyone inside. The point is summer would not feel as good. Like the reason that spring and early summer feels so good it’s like, it’s like everybody’s coming out right, coming outta the woodwork all of a sudden. And so, yeah. If we didn’t have that time to be like, oh, this is like we, we miss it for a little while, then we look forward to it again.

Okay, now, after adjusting our mindset, we gotta get our gear in check. I have learned that half of the battle when it comes to winter is just having the right gear.

Because if you have gear that’s going to make it more enjoyable, you’re not gonna fret so much. It’s not just about having winter hats and gloves and coats and all of those kinds of things. It’s also about getting the proper gear that will allow you to go out and do activities that you like to do in the winter.

So if you love like riding your bike or you love running, for example, like maybe get a pair of fleece line tights, if that’s the thing that still loves you to run like, ’cause in the summers what you look forward to is running outside, you can still run outside in the winter. You just need to have the right gear.

This can also be something as simple as like getting really good hand cream and chapstick and like a good face lotion that keeps you hydrated. Like all these little things that I’m like, this just makes it more enjoyable. This year I invested in a really, really cozy robe from Brooklinen and it’s this like plush robe that feels like a bath towel. It’s insane. It’s so soft. So I got that. I wanted like a big oversized robe so I could like really wrap myself. I got this towel warmer so that I can put my towel in it before I get in the shower, and it warms my towel. And I invested in like an actually nice pair of house shoes, like nicer slippers than what I’ve had before.

These are all just like little things that it’s not just like, oh, this is just getting me through the winter. I, I look forward to getting done with work on any day, taking a warm shower and then putting that robe on and putting those slippers on.

The third thing you can do is to actually make it fun. Look for things about winter that make this fun. Are there things in the winter near you that are outdoor activities? Like for example, I went to an owl prowl at a local nature rehab center. You can only go to those in the winter. You can’t go in the summer. So like what? Are there specific things near you that are actually fun?

There’s obviously, there was tons of stuff for the holidays each year. There might be something for Valentine’s Day coming up near you. I know there’s a restaurant near me that has those really cool igloos that you can book a table in to eat outside, and it’s like this warm, cozy, candlelit igloo. Like there are fun things about the winter that you just have to build into your schedule to make it fun.

I also make it fun by booking myself a couple of things that I don’t like, things that I want to do, but I don’t want to do in the summer because I live in such a beachy place. So for example, right now I’m in a pottery class, and so. I have always wanted to take pottery class, but pottery classes tend to be offered in the spring and summer and fall where I live, and that’s when I wanna be on the beach.

So I don’t want to be sitting in a class for hours and hours per day doing this class. So I booked it over the winter. I was like, that is a perfect winter activity. I also really wanna learn how to knit, because when my mom died, I got all of my mom’s knitting stuff. She was an incredible knitter. Like that’s another activity where that’s just like something I would look forward to., Once I learned how to do that, I feel like that will be something that would be such a cozy winter activity.

The next thing I do is to make it as cozy as possible. Being cozy is so important to me, and yes, there are certain, you know, more like physical items that I get, like the robe and the slippers those kinds of things make it as cozy as possible.

But I also have invested in things over the years, like new lighting sources or better candles, or even like battery operated candles. Things that I know contribute to my overall wellbeing and happiness in this darker, colder season.

And of course, last but not least, when in doubt if you know that this is a time of year that you struggle with, I encourage you to plan a trip each year. Like instead. I know for me, I’m like, I don’t wanna go away in the summer because of where we live, so let’s plan our trip for like February, March when I know I can’t take it anymore, that it’s so cold. It gives me something to look forward to all winter. But it does also give me that escape.

If you can’t plan a big trip away from home right now, I would encourage you to look to see if anywhere near you has a sauna. Specifically an infrared sauna. I really, really like those, like the red light saunas. They are so nice and sitting in there for half an hour does feel like you are sitting on the beach.

On even a smaller level, you can do things like buying a little light for your desk. You could talk to your doctor about a vitamin D supplement. I know that that really helps me. Of course, check with your doctor first, see what they recommend for you, but like buying, recommended, taking, um, a vitamin D uh, supplement. So I’m on that. That helps. And if I could give you any one tip today that’s completely free and it’s something that every single one of you could go out and do today, it’s to just start to shift this attitude and try. Just give me 10 minutes that you bundle up. You get the gear on, you put all the things, go outside and take a walk in the fresh air. No matter how cold it is. Let the sun kiss your skin, feel the sun, feel the cold air. Feel how invigorating it is, especially when you have all the right gear and you’re bundled up for it.

But there’s something about just like. I don’t know, getting out in that cold air and feeling so refreshed, if you follow me on Instagram, you know that this winter I’ve been taking my solo walks every single day, and a lot of days I have to do them in the dark because it gets dark so early where I live, and my neighborhood has no lights. No sidewalks or anything. So it’s literally like me, a bunch of seagulls, a bunch of deer and raccoons, and I’m out there walking in the dark with my headlamp. That’s another thing. I got a little headlamp that goes on my hat. Um, I also have a hat that has a light built into it I can see at night. But I will literally go out and get that. I will still feel so much better. I will guarantee you that you will feel better taking a cold walk, getting some fresh air than you will sitting at home sitting on the couch saying, I hate winter. I can’t wait till it’s warmer up like guaranteed. That’s the only guarantee I will ever make on this podcast, and I’m pretty sure I guarantee that one. So I’m so curious from you, like, do you have any winter tips for me or for the rest of my audience? I would love to hear from you. What are some ways that you get through winter in a healthier, happier way? My dms are always open. I’m at samvanderwielen on Instagram, or shoot me an email, reply to any of my emails that you get. I wanna hear from you, hear how you not just survive, but thrive in the winter.

Speaking of winter, I hope to see you next week at my first live legal training of the entire year called Five Steps to Legally Protect and Grow your Online Business. I will not host this again until the end of the year. If you wanna make sure you save your seat now, just click the link down below in the show notes or sign up for my weekly Sams Sidebar emails, and you’ll be sure to get emails about this free live training.

Hopefully I’ll see you there next week. If not, I will see you back here on the podcast next Monday. Talk to you soon.

Thanks so much for listening to the On Your Terms® podcast. Make sure to follow on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you like to listen to podcasts. You can also check out all of our podcast episodes, show notes, links, and more at samvanderwielen.com/podcast. You can learn more about legally protecting your business and take my free legal workshop, Five Steps To Legally Protect and Grow Your Online Business at Samvanderwielen.com and to stay connected and follow along, follow me on Instagram at samvanderwielen and send me a DM to say hi.